善待自己吧！做最好的自己才能更好地爱人
I used to believe that love meant putting everyone else and their needs first, before my own.While I do think there is some truth to that, in the sense that being a giving person is one of the ultimate acts of being a loving person, I came to realize that I must give to and love myself first and foremost.以前，我相信爱就意味着要把他人和他人的需求放在自己的需求之前。现在我仍然认为这种观点有一定的道理，因为作一个“施爱者”的最高境界之一就是作一个“给予者”。但是，我渐渐意识到，给予自己、爱自己才是最重要的。
Here\'s why: 原因如下：
When you put everyone and everything else above you, you are no longer valuing yourself and your needs.And when you are not meeting your needs, and you don\'t take care of yourself (emotionally, physically, mentally, spiritually), you can\'t be the best version of yourself to the special people in your life.So in eence, you don\'t love them at your full potential! 当你把一切其他人、其他事都置于自己之上时，你就不能再看到自己的价值、考虑自己的需求了。而当你无法满足自己的需求时，你就不能（从心理上、生理上、思想上、精神上）好好照顾自己了。这样，对你生命中那些特别的人来说，你便无法成为那个最好的自己。所以，从本质上说，你没有尽自己一切潜能来爱他们！ Here are some things to consider —
你需要思考一下：
1.Are you physically taking care of yourself? Do you nourish yourself with the right foods, get enough sleep, exercise, are at a healthy weight, and on top of your check-ups? If not, I bet your energy is low, you\'re tired and streed, and your confidence isn\'t the highest (because you probably don\'t feel your best).Now think about how much more you could give to others when you aren\'t exhausted, you\'re happy with what you see in the mirror, and you aren\'t on edge with stre.
1、你好好照顾自己的身体了吗？你有没有做到合理饮食以获得营养、得到足够的睡眠和锻炼、维持健康体重并保持体检各项指标都正常？如果没有，我敢说你的能量肯定很有限，你感到疲倦、压力很大，而且信心也不在最高值（因为你很可能不在最佳状态）。现在，想象一下，如果你不疲惫，乐于看到镜中的自己，而且没有因为压力而感到烦躁不安，你能为别人多做多少事啊！
2.Are you emotionally and mentally healthy? As humans, we\'re so complex and having ups and downs is normal.But in general, ae where you stand emotionally.If it\'s in a healthy place and you can manage your emotions in a healthy way — great! But if you self-soothe in destructive ways and have a negative attitude and energy about you, realize that it\'s not just affecting you, but others too.When you aren\'t an emotionally and mentally healthy person, that energy pours into everything you do, and everyone you\'re around will feel the effects, too.
2、你的情绪和思想都是健康的吗？作为人类，我们是非常复杂的，心情时好时坏很正常。但是你可以总体评估一下自己的情绪状况。如果你的情绪很健康，而且你可以以一种健康的方式来掌控自己的情绪，那太棒了！但是，如果你的自我安慰方式是毁灭式的、对自己的态度消极悲观、充满负能量，那么你要意识到这种情况不仅会影响到你自己，还会影响到别人。如果你不是一个情绪、思想都健康的人，那么负能量会倾泻到你做的所有事情上，而你周围的每个人都会受到影响。
3.How\'s your spirituality? In this sense, spirituality is about having an ultimate purpose and being in tune with your true self.Do you wake up every day excited for what your life is about, and have gratitude for all the abundance you already have? If not, you may not be listening and living to what your heart truly desires.Living this way long term, may affect the eence of your inner being and, in turn, may not allow you to show up your very best for the world.
3、你的精神状况如何？在这里，精神状况指的是怀有一个终极人生目标，并且和真实的自己合拍。你是不是每天早晨醒来都会为自己的人生感到很兴奋，为你拥有的一切心怀感恩之情？如果不是，也许你没有倾听自己心中真实的渴望、没有活成真正的自己。长此以往，可能会影响到你的内在自我本质。话说回来，你也无法向这个世界呈现最棒的自己。
Be kind to yourself.It can be difficult to put your health and wellbeing first when life is demanding between your career, family, friendships, relationships, and so on.If you can think of any ways to improve your wellbeing and love yourself more, start today! Take a baby step towards this.Perhaps try getting an hour more of sleep.Move your body in a way that feels good.Take time for yourself to be with your thoughts and without distractions and feel that peace.善待自己吧。把自己的健康和幸福放在前面可能会很难，因为我们需要平衡事业、家庭、友谊、爱情，等等。但如果你想到什么方法，可以提高自己的幸福感，可以更爱自己一些，那么就从今天开始实践吧！先向这个方向迈出一小步也是好的——比如，尽量多睡一小时，以自己感到舒服的方式活动活动身体，拿出时间与自己对话，远离纷扰，感受那份安宁。
Celebrity culture evolves 90后的追星文化
It was probably one of the biggest entertainment scandals to hit last month – Kris Wu (吴亦凡), a former member of the South Korean band EXO, was accused of having a string of casual relationships with women who were left feeling hurt and used.上个月娱乐圈爆出的一大丑闻，恐怕就是韩国EXO组合前成员吴亦凡被指与多名女性有染了。事后，这些传闻中的女主都表示很伤心，感到自己是被利用了。Yet, what ended up drawing the most attention was not Wu’s arguably questionable lifestyle.Instead, it was what Wu’s fans were doing to support their idol: They posted malicious comments on the Sina Weibo account of the woman who first posted the accusations, and they declared their devotion to Wu, no matter what.然而，最令人关注的却不是吴亦凡有争议的生活作风，而是其粉丝对他的声援：他们在第一个爆料吴亦凡事件的女生微博下恶语相向，表示无论如何都会力挺自己的偶像。
This incident has led people to believe that fervent fans are so protective of their idols that they can easily become aggreive.这件事让人们意识到，这些狂热的粉丝对自己的偶像十分保护，且很容易就变得偏激。
In fact, it has been said that, recently, the idol worship some fans practice has become like religion.Fans are like pilgrims following a strict set of rituals – closely watching for any news concerning their idol, organizing fan bases and activities for their idol, and even spending their money to buy hundreds of copies of their idol’s albums to contribute to the sales totals.事实上，人们发现近年来一些粉丝对偶像的崇拜已经近乎于一种宗教信仰。粉丝就像严格遵守一系列宗教仪式的朝圣者一般——密切跟进有关自己偶像的一切新闻，组织粉丝群和粉丝活动，甚至为了增加偶像唱片的销量，一口气买下几百张专辑。 “The internet-based model of ‘making a star’ is changing China’s economy,”
financial writer Wu Xiaobo told GQ magazine.“互联网上的造星模式正在改变着中国的经济，”财经作家吴晓波这样告诉男性时尚杂志《GQ》。
According to Wu, the traditional path to stardom was to first produce a good album or film, then receive media coverage, and finally get heightened exposure by becoming part of a trending topic.But the new model is completely different: Stars gather fans who are attracted to their looks and personalities and leave the rest – the marketing and media coverage – to their devotees.在吴晓波看来，传统的星途是，新人首先要有一个好的专辑或者电影作品，然后获得媒体报道，最后由于成为热门话题而被高度曝光。然而如今的新模式却完全不同：明星们因长相和个性而吸引粉丝，然后将其余的市场营销和媒体宣传都交给其拥趸者来完成。
A changing demographic从70后到90后：不一样的粉丝群
Not all fans appreciate the way celebrity culture is changing.Rolink Han, currently a student at UK’s Sheffield Hallam University, used to self-identify as a hard-core fan of Tang Yan, the actre of TV series My Sunshine (《何以笙箫默》,2015).但并非所有粉丝都欣赏追星文化的这种改变。英国谢菲尔德哈勒姆大学的学生Rolink Han过去曾认为自己是电视剧《何以笙箫默》的女主演唐嫣的“死忠粉”。
Han said she resents fans who are quick to jump into quarrels.“They are too devoted to their idols to even think rationally,” she said.Rolink Han称自己很讨厌那种一言不合就吵架的粉丝。“他们是偶像的死忠粉，根本就无法理性思考，”她说。
Han was drawn to Tang when she was still in the starting phase of her acting career back in 2010.Together with a large number of other fans, Han has organized various promotional activities, like parties for Tang’s birthday, over the past few years.2010年，唐嫣还是一名演艺圈新人的时候，Rolink Han就开始喜欢她了。在过去的几年里，她和众多粉丝一起为偶像组织了各种推广活动，比如唐嫣的生日派对。
When asked what about Tang impreed her, Han said simply, “She is pretty and friendly.”当被问起为什么喜欢唐嫣时，她的回答很简单，“她很漂亮，也很友善。” Today’s popular idols, like Tang and former EXO member Lu Han, are mostly quiet and well-behaved.This may seem at odds with their target demographic: young people born in the 1990s and later, a generation largely depicted as rebellious and unconventional.But Li Songwei, a doctor of psychology at Peking University, has an explanation.今天的大多数流行偶像，如唐嫣和EXO组合前成员鹿晗，都十分低调且彬彬有礼。这似乎和他们目标粉丝群的特征格格不入：他们的粉丝多为90后的年轻人，被认为是打破传统的叛逆一代。对此，北京大学心理学博士李松蔚作出了解释。
“The generations born in the 1970s and 1980s were brought up under the heavy restrictions perpetuated by mainstream culture, which is why they are more eager to challenge conventions and vent their oppreed feelings,” Li told GQ magazine.But the younger generation is different.“The post-1990 generation already lives in a relatively free cultural environment.What they long for are things that are purely beautiful, positive and innocent.”“70后和80后的一代人受当时主流文化影响，成长环境中有许多条条框框。所以他们十分热衷于挑战传统，发泄自己压抑的情绪，”李松蔚告诉《GQ》杂志。但是如今年轻的一代就不同了。“90后已经生活在一个相对宽松的文化氛围中，而他们所渴望的只是美丽、积极而又单纯的东西。”
2016年世界环境日致辞 This year\'s observance of World Environment Dayshines a much-needed spotlight on the illegal tradein wildlife.There is grave cause for alarm.Elephantsare being slaughtered for their ivory, rhinos for theirhorns, and pangolins for their scales.From seaturtles to tigers to rosewood, thousands of species of wild animals and plants are being driven ever closer to extinction.The businees and individuals involved are motivated solely by short-term gain at the expense of long-term benefit to communities and habitats.In many instances, they act in collusion with transnational organized crime networks and groups actively involved indestabilizing nations.今年纪念世界环境日聚焦的是急需关注的非法野生动植物贸易。警钟长鸣是因为问题严重。为取得象牙而屠杀大象，为取得犀角而屠杀犀牛，为取得鳞甲而屠杀穿山甲；从海龟到老虎到紫檀，数以千计的野生动植物种正日益濒临灭绝。参与其中的企业和个人纯粹受短期利益驱动，不惜牺牲社区和生境的长期惠益。在许多情况下，他们与跨国有组织犯罪网络和积极参与破坏国家稳定的团体相勾结。
The United Nations and its many partners have resolved to tackle this illicit trade, including by setting clear targets to put an end to poaching in the Sustainable Development Goals, adopted last year by all 193 Member States.Last month, at the second United Nations Environment Aembly in Nairobi, we launched a UN \"Wild For Life\" global campaign, led by the UN Environment Programme (UNEP), the UN Development Programme (UNDP), the UN Office and Crime (UNODC) and the Convention on the International Trade in Wild Species of Fauna and Flora (CITES).The campaign asks everyone to pledge to end the illegal trade in wildlife, from ordinary citizens, who can ensure they do not buy prohibited products, to governments, who can pursue change through implementing effective policies to protect species and ecosystems.联合国和它的许多伙伴决心打击这种非法贸易，为此在去年所有 193个会员国通过的可持续发展目标下制定了终止偷猎的明确的具体目标。上个月，在内罗毕举行的第二届联合国环境大会上，我们发起了由联合国环境规划署（环境署）、联合国开发计划署（开发署）、联合国毒品和犯罪问题办公室（毒品和犯罪问题办公室）和濒危野生动植物种国际贸易公约（《濒危物种公约》）牵头的一场联合国全球运动\"为生命呐喊\"。运动要求不论普通公民还是各国政府，每个人都承诺结束野生动植物非法贸易，普通公民可以确保不购买违禁产品，各国政府则可以通过执行有效政策保护物种和生态系统而寻求变革。
Angola, which is this year\'s World Environment Day global host, has served notice that it will no longer tolerate the sale of illegal wildlife products, and is strengthening legislation and increasing border controls as part of efforts to restore elephant populations that were devastated by the country\'s civil war.Such action sends a strong meage that wild species of plants and animals are a precious commodity that must be sustainably managed and protected from illegal trade.安哥拉是今年世界环境日的全球东道国，它已发出通告表示其将不再容忍销售非法野生动植物产品，并正在加强立法和增加边境管制措施，以努力恢复其因本国内战而遭到摧毁的大象数量。这种行动发出了强烈信息，即野生动植物种是一种宝贵的商品，必须得到可持续的管理，使其不受非法贸易的伤害。
On this World Environment Day, I urge people and governments everywhere to overcome indifference, combat greed and act to preserve our natural heritage for the benefit of this and future generations.在这个世界环境日，我敦促世界各国政府和人民克服冷漠、打击贪婪并采取行动保护我们的自然遗产，这样做利在当代、利在千秋。
为什么我是单身狗？
Is THIS why you\'re single? Experts reveal the reasons you could be struggling to find love...and the very simple ways you can fix it Are you single? Are you confused as to how this state of affairs has come about? Our experts may be able to explain.
你是单身？你对为什么自己单身感到困惑吗？我们的专家也许能为你解答。
Your social media 你的社交媒体
The Inner Circle founder, David Vermeulen, says your social media channels may be the reason you are single.Inner Circle创始人大卫•韦尔默朗说，你的社交媒体可能是你单身的原因。
\'Try to refrain from posting your political stance on controversial topics such as Brexit and immigration online.“试着不要发帖表明你对英国脱欧和移民问题等争议性话题的政治立场。”
\'Broadcasting your political views on your social media channels can succefully eliminate any potential suitors with opposing views from making an approach before you have even met, meaning that you may never meet the man/woman of your dreams, all due to one off the cuff remark,\' he suggests.他建议说：“在社交媒体上传播你的政治观点很可能会赶走潜在的追求者，因为还没见面你就发表了与他们相反的意见。这意味着你可能永远不会见到你的梦中情人，全都因一个即兴的评论。”
He also warns against posting cryptic statuses, such as: \'my life is like a black hole, everything good gets swallowed up\'.他还警告说不要发一些隐晦的状态，比如：“我的人生就像一个黑洞，一切美好的东西都会被吞噬。”
He explains: \'Of course, as empathetic human beings, we care if something bad is happening to you.But, a cryptic status like this serves us in no way whatsoever.All the reader gets out of this self-indulgent status is a sense that you would be a nightmare to be in a relationship with.\' 他解释说：“当然，作为感同身受的人类，如果在你身上发生了坏事我们会很关心。但这种隐晦的状态让我们无从关心。所有读者从这样一个任性的状态得到的感觉是：与你交往会是一个噩梦。”
David also says posting too many selfies can put off potential suitors, explaining that they may think that you are self-absorbed or very narciistic and refrain from approaching you.\'Would you want to be in a relationship with someone who cares more about the selfie lighting situation on a date, than the date itself, I doubt it?\', he asks.戴维还说，发太多的自拍可能让潜在的追求者反感，他解释说他们可能会认为你很自私或很自恋，不想接近你。他问道:“你想跟那些更在乎约会时的自拍光线情况而非约会本身的人交往么？我对此持怀疑态度。”
Your attitude 你的态度
Jack Knowles, founder of dating app Temptr, says that many single people that he encounters seem to carry a typical ‘woe is me attitude’ when it comes to explaining to friends and family members the reason behind why they haven’t yet found ‘the one’ to settle down with, especially once they have reached a certain age.杰克•诺尔斯是约会应用Temptr的创始人，他说自己遇到的很多单身人士，他们在向朋友和家人解释为什么还没找到一个人“安定”下来的背后原因时，似乎持一种典型的“我好命苦啊”的态度。当他们已经到了一定年龄时尤其如此。
\'Sadly, this method of feeling sorry for oneself can very much exacerbate a situation and gives potential suitors a reason to stay away,\' he said.\'Basically, it’s hard to find a partner when you reek of desperation.\' 他说：“可悲的是，这种垂头丧气的方法非常可能使情况恶化，并让潜在的追求者远离你。如果你散发着绝望的气息，基本上很难找到伴侣。” You\'re too picky 你太挑剔了
Lucy Jones, relationship expert at ToyboyWarehouse.com, says the internet is to blame for us being too picky.露西•琼斯是toyboywarehouse.com网站的恋情专家，她说我们太挑剔都怪互联网。
She said: \'Before the explosion of internet dating and social media, you had just a handful of potential partners.You either ended up dating a friend of a friend, a coworker, or someone you bumped into at the coffee shop.How many potential partners do we have now? Hundreds of thousands! 她说：“在网上约会和社交媒体激增之前，你只有几个的潜在伴侣。你要么与朋友的朋友、同事约会，要么跟你在咖啡店偶遇的某个人约会。我们现在有多少潜在的伴侣？成千上万！”
\'You get chatting to a guy online, you’re thinking of taking things to the next level and meeting up.He seems great and all, but with so many other profiles out there how can you commit? There are scores of other guys just a few taps away, maths tell us one of them is almost certainly a better fit for you.“你和一个人网上聊天，你想让关系更进一步，见个面。他似乎很棒，但还有这么多其他人，你怎么能做出承诺？只需聊几次就能认识几十个其他男士，数学告诉我们，其中一个几乎肯定更适合你。
\'How do you get over this? By being le picky? Well sort of.You might have acce to tens of thousands of single potential partners, but it’s going to take an entire lifetime to judge them all.\' “你怎么克服这个问题？变得不那么挑剔？这是不错的方法。你可能有机会与成千上万单身的潜在伴侣聊天，但要对所有人进行判断得花一辈子。”
She recommends changing your mindset and stopping concentrating on future lost chances, instead focusing on what will make you content today.她建议改变心态，别再关注未来失去的机会，而是关注今天让你满意的人。
\'I have a type\' “我有喜欢的类型”
Lucy Jones says that dating is a buffet - the best way to build your preferences is to sample everything on offer.露西•琼斯说，约会是一种自助餐——建立喜好的最好方法是尝试一切提供给你的类型。
She explains: \'The iue is when we judge someone on whether they are our type or not, we do so on surface level appearances and personality traits.But when we date someone, it’s the characteristics under the surface level which dictate whether or not they’re a fit for us.\'
她解释说：“问题是当我们判断一个人是否是我们喜欢的类型时，我们只评价了外貌和个性特征。但是当我们与某人约会时，更深层次的品质决定了他们是否适合我们。”
So, she recommends branching out and dating guys who you usually wouldn’t date.\'Get to know a personality you’ve never experienced before.Maybe you won’t find your dream guy, maybe you will.What you’re bound to gain, however, is a better understanding of what you want in a partner.\' 所以，她建议扩大范围，与你通常不会约会的男士约会。“去了解一种你从未经历过的个性。也许你不会找到梦想中的人，也许你会。但你肯定能对你想要什么样的伴侣有更好的理解。”
You haven\'t let go of an ex 你还没对前任放手
Your future relationships are affected by a wide range of things, your connection to your ex is one of the most impactful, says Lucy.露西说，你未来的恋情关系受到多种因素的影响，你与前任的联系是最有影响力的事情之一。
\'You might notice the conscious changes your ex has caused (e.g.staying away from guys that remind you of your ex, not going to locations that hold some kind of significance), but there are so many unconscious changes that you’re probably unaware of.“你可能会注意到你因为前任而引起的明显变化（例如，远离那些让你想起前任的人，不去那些有某种特殊意义的地方），但你可能不知道还有这么多无意识的改变。”
\'Don’t worry, we are a product of our experiences so this is perfectly normal.However, where it becomes dangerous is when these unconscious changes stop us from starting new relationships and forming new connections.
“别担心，我们是自身经验的产物，所以这是完全正常的。然而，当这些无意识的改变阻碍我们开始新的恋情、建立新的联系时，它就变得危险了。” \'If you think you’re a victim of this, it’s important to concentrate on breaking off your feelings for your past relationships before ever starting a new one.For certain occasions a new love will make the break-up easier, but it’s rare and it’s hardly fair on your new partner.Break-ups are between two people, don’t endanger something special by starting a relationship before you’re totally unconnected.\' “如果你认为自己是这一问题的受害者，在开始一段新的恋情之前，集中精力打破你对过去感情的感觉很重要。某些情况下，一份新的爱情会使分手变得没那么难过，但这很少见，而且对你的新伴侣不公平。分手是两人之间的事情，在与前任完全结束之前，不要建立新的关系，以免伤害对你来说很特殊的人。”
So how can you find the one? As Lucy explains, when Prince Charming was trying to find Cinderella he visited every house in the kingdom, trying that gla slipper on every foot he could; he didn’t just keep his fingers croed hoping she’d show up.那么你怎么能找到那个命中注定的人呢？正如露西解释的，当白马王子试图找到灰姑娘时，他访问了王国的每一个家庭，尽量让每个人试穿那双水晶鞋；他没有只是手指交叉祈祷她出现。
\'I’m not saying you need to travel the country knocking on every man’s door,\' she said.\'Just try being open to new experiences and meeting new people.Expand your experiences and escape your comfort zone.By saying yes to the world you’re improving your chances of bumping into Prince Charming.Unfortunately he’s not going to turn up at your door while you’re watching Netflix in bed.她说：“我并不是说你需要在这个国家旅行，每个男人的门都敲。试着接纳新的体验，结交新的朋友。扩充你的经历，逃离你的舒适区。通过对这个世界说Yes，你会提高遇见白马王子的机会。不幸的是，你在床上看片儿的时候，他不会出现在你的门口。”
\'Learn to enjoy rolling the dice more often, eventually you’ll hit the jackpot.\' “学会享受掷更多次骰子，最终你会中头彩。”
Vocabulary
off the cuff：即兴地
bump into：无意中遇到，偶然碰到
英文来源：每日邮报
