I’m not insane,my mother had me tested.-我没疯，我妈带我做过检查了。
-Once again,you’ve fallen for one of my claic pranks.Bazinga! -你又一次掉进我的经典恶作剧陷阱了。气死你！
-I’m clealy too evolved for driving.(S2E5) -很明显，我已经进化到不需要开车了。
-Woman, you are playing with forces beyond your ken.(To Penny S2E7) -女人，你在和一个智慧比你高得多的人较劲。
-When you understand the laws of physics,penny,anything is poible.(To Penny S2E7) -当你领悟到物理学的真谛之后，佩妮，一切皆有可能
-I suggest rock-paper-sciors-lizard-Spork.-我提议石头剪刀布蜥蜴史帕克。
-I brought this on myself by being such an endearing ad important part of your life。(To Penny S2E11) -谁让我不小心成为你生命中美好又重要的一部分呢。
She calls me moon pie because I’m nummy-nummy and she could just eat me up.( To Penny S2E17) -她之所以叫我小甜派是因为我看起来很可口，她想要一口把我吃掉。
I’m a physicist.I have a working knowledge of the entire universe and everything it contains.(To Penny) -我可是物理学家,拥有整个宇宙及其所有事物的相关知识。
-I realize you’re also on your own tonight,so if ,at some point, you find yourself with nothing to do,please do not disturb me.(To Penny S2E21) -我知道你今晚也是一个人，如果你万一觉得一个人无聊了，请不要来打扰我。
- I realize you\'re currently at the mercy of your primitive biological urges, but as you have an enti life time of poor decisions ahead of you, may I interrupt this one?（to penny S3E1）
-我明白你现在正完全被最原始的野性冲动所控制，可是，反正你这辈子还会有 无数错误的决定，我能不能打断这一个？
-You know,I can buy all these things online.I come here for the personal service.(to Stuart S03E05) -你知道我本可以在网上买这些的，我来这就是为了个性化服务的。
-Leonard,when that woman moved in three years ago,I told you not to talk to her, and now look,we\'re going to be late for the movies.（to Leonard S03E07）
-莱纳德，那女的三年前搬进来时，我就告诉你不要搭理她，现在好了，电影我 们是迟到定了。
1.台阶的高度偏差2mm大多数人就会绊倒
-Sheldon: You want to hear an interesting thing about stairs? 你想听有关楼梯好玩的事吗？ -Leonard: Not really.不太想。
-Sheldon: If the height of a single step is off by 2 millimeters, most people will trip 如果一个台阶的高度偏差2mm大多数人就会绊倒。
2.去高智商精子库捐精的本质
-Penny: So, what do you guys do for fun around here? 那你们平时都玩些什么？
-Sheldon: Well, today we tried masturbating for money.今天我们刚试过靠自慰赚钱。
3.找个自己一个最适合的位置吧
-Sheldon: In the winter, that seat is close enough to the radiator to remain warm, 冬天的时候，这个地方离电暖器最近，很暖和， and yet not so close as to cause perspiration; 也不会很热到直流汗。
in the summer, it\'s directly in the path of a cro-breeze created by opening windows there, and there.夏天的时候，这里又刚好可以吹过堂风，是来自这扇窗户和那扇的。
It faces the television at an angle that is neither direct, thus discouraging conversation, 而且坐这里看电视的角度，可以直接看，又不会影响谈话， nor so far wide as to create a parallax distortion.不会太远而造成视察错觉?
4.不要过分相信星座，这会让你看起来很愚昧
-Penny: Um...me? Okay.我? 好的。
I\'m a Sagittarius, which probably tells you way more than you need to know.我是射手座的。这样你们就能了解很多想知道的事了。
-Sheldon: Yes.It tells us that you participate in the ma cultural delusion 是啊，这让我们知道你被大众文化所迷惑了 that the sun\'s apparent position relative to arbitrarily defined constellations at the time of your birth somehow affects your personality.根据太阳的位置随便胡乱定个星座以及你的出生日期影响了你的性格
I thought she was a highly evolved creature of pure intellect, like me.But recent events indicate that she may be a slave to her baser urges.我以为她是个高度进化的纯高智商物种，就像我。而最近的事件表明她也许不过是个屈服于低级欲望的生物。
If the correct way to do it is the wrong way, then I yield.如果胡来才是正确的方法的话，那我闭嘴。
Sheldon: Sciors cuts paper, paper covers rock, rock crushes lizard, lizard poisons Spock, Spock smashes sciors, sciors decapitates lizard, lizard eats paper, paper disproves Spock, Spock vaporizes rock, and as it always has, rock crushes sciors.谢耳朵：剪刀剪纸，纸包石头，石头砸蜥蜴，蜥蜴毒死斯巴克，斯巴克击碎剪刀，剪刀砍断蜥蜴，蜥蜴吃了纸，纸反驳斯巴克，斯巴克蒸发石头，最后就是一直都那样的，石头硌坏剪子。
Sheldon: Why are you crying?Penny: Because I\'m stupid!Sheldon: That\'s no reason to cry.One cries because one is sad.For example, I cry because others are stupid, and that makes me sad.谢耳朵：你为嘛哭呢？佩妮：因为我太傻了！谢耳朵：这可不是什么好理由。大家都是因为伤心才哭嘛。比方我吧，我总为别人太傻哭，因为人家愚蠢搞得我很伤心
Raj: I don\'t like bugs, okay? They freak me out.Sheldon: Interesting.You\'re afraid of insects and women.Ladybugs must render you catatonic.Raj：我不喜欢虫子行了吧？吓得我半死。谢耳朵：有意思。你害怕虫子，还有女人。要见着个花大姐准让你神经分裂了。 Leonard: What got into him? Penny: Oh, a couple of virgin Cuba Libres who turned out to be a little slutty.Leonard: You didn\'t.Penny: You do your little experiments, I do mine.雷纳德：他喝什么了？
佩妮：可能是杯并不太纯的纯自由古巴酒吧。
雷纳德：你不是吧。
佩妮：你们管你们做实验，我管我做咯
Howard is teaching Sheldon Chinese*.Howard: You know, I\'m really glad you decided to learn Mandarin.Sheldon: Why?Howard: Once you\'re fluent, you\'ll have a billion more people to annoy instead of me .霍华德：话说，你终于要学普通话了我还真高兴。
谢耳朵：为嘛？
霍华德：等你说顺溜了，有十多亿中国人民等着你去烦，你就不用来烦我了。
Leonard: What were you doing at Penny\'s? Sheldon: Well, we had dinner, played some games, and then I spent the night.Oh, and you\'ll be happy to know that I now have a much better understanding of \'friends with benefits.\' 雷纳德：你在佩妮那儿干嘛呢？
谢耳朵：吃了顿饭，玩了点儿游戏，然后留下过夜了。哦，现在我对什么叫“床伴”有了更深入的理解，你高兴吧。
Penny: I give up.He\'s impoible! Sheldon: I can\'t be impoible; I exist! I think what you meant to say is, \'I give up; he\'s improbable\'.佩妮：我放弃了。他真是不可理喻。
谢耳朵：我不会不可能的啊，我存在即有可能。我觉得你想说的是“我放弃了，他不像是真的。”
Sheldon: I\'m not insane, my mother had me tested! 谢耳朵：我才没疯呢，我妈带我去测过好吧？
*In tattoo salon*.Girl: What are you gonna get, Raj? Raj: With my luckthou art a heartle bitch.谢耳朵：啊，地心引力，汝乃没心没肺之婊子。
