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英语小幽默

发布时间:2020-03-02 13:48:58 来源:范文大全 收藏本文 下载本文 手机版

Joke:Bill, AL and Bill

Bill Clinton, Bill Gates, and Al Gore were in an airplane that crashed.They\'re up in heaven, and God`s sitting on the great white throne.God addreed Al first.

\"Al, what do you believe in?\"

Al replied, \"Well, I believe that the combustion engine is evil and that we need to save the world from CFCs and that if any more freon is used,the whole earth will become a

greenhouse and we`ll all die.\" God thinks for a second and said, \"Okay, I can live with that.Come and sit at my left.\"

God then addrees Bill Clinton.\"Bill, what do you believe in?\"

Bill Clinton replies, \"Well, I believe in power to the people.I think people should be able to make their own choices about things and that no one should ever be able to tell someone else what to do.I also believe in feeling people`s pain.\" God thinks for a second and says

\"Okay, that sounds good.Come and sit at my right.\"

God then addre Bill Gates.\"Bill Gates, what do you believe in?\"

Bill Gates said, \"I believe you`re in my chair.\"

人之初:At the begining of life.

性本善:Sex is good.

性相近:Basically,all the sex are same.

习相远:But it depends on how the way you do it.

苟不教:If you do not practise all the time.

性乃迁:Sex will leave you..

教之道:The way of learning it

贵以专:is very important to make love with only one person.

昔孟母:Once a great mother, Mrs Meng

择邻处:chose her neighbour to avoid bad sex influence.

子不学:If you don\'t study hard,

断机杼:Your Dick will become usele.

窦燕山 Dou, the Famous

有义方 owned a very effective exciting medicine

教五子 All his five son took it

名俱扬 and their sexual ability were well-kown.

养不教 If your children don\'t know how to do it,

父之过 It is all your fault.

教不严 If they had lots of problems with it,

师之惰 their teach must be too lazy to tell them details on sex.

子不学 You may refuse to study this

非所宜 but that is a real mistake

幼不学 If you don\'t learn it in childhood,

老何为 you will lose your ability when aged

玉不琢 If you don\'t exercise your dick,

不成器 It won\'t become hard and strong.

人不学 If you don\'t learn sex,

不知义 You can by no means enjoy its sweetne

Bush got something wrong with his brain.

After medical examination, doctor tells him:

Your brain has two parts: one is left, and another is right.

Your left brain has nothing right,

Your right brain has nothing left.

Old Man And Donkey

There was an old man, a boy and a donkey.They were going to town and it was decided that the boy should ride.As they went along they paed some people who thought that it was a shame for the boy to ride and the old man to walk.

The man and boy decided that maybe the critics were right so they changed positions.Later, they paed some more people who thought that it was a real shame for that man to make such asmall boy walk.The two decided that maybe they both should walk.

Soon they paed some more people who thought that it was stupid to walk when they had a donkey to ride.The man and the boy decided maybe the critics were right so they decided that they both should ride.

They soon paed other people who thought that it was a shame to put such a load on a poor little animal.The old man and the boy decided that maybe the critics were right so they decided to carry the donkey.

As they croed a bridge they lost their grip on the animal and it fell into the river and drowned.

The moral of the story is...if you try to please everyone, you will eventually lose your a.

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